I Envy Your 5-Year Plan

Remember that time I was about to turn 27 and had no idea what to do with my life? haha (In real life that would be an awkward laugh with a resigned sigh at the end.)

So there I was on the Interwebs, trying to plan out how to spend a 6 day break coming up. Then I start looking at jobs, and am thinking to myself, "D$, if you can't determine a 6-day plan, how are you going to figure out a whole-life plan?" Yes, I am having a melodramatic moment here, people. Recently, I seem to be vacillating between these types of existential meltdowns and a devil-may-care, "let's see what happens!" attitude. Is this healthy? Likely not.

I think the root of my current career crisis is that I have never related to the idea of having a "Dream Job." Over the years I have fancied myself going into a number of professions: paleontologist, astronaut, senator, journalist, television-something-or-other, space tourism flight attendant, ghost hunter and the like. But when I think about it, I've never really had a dream job per se. Even with journalism, a career that I went to a stupidly expensive school hundreds of miles from home with the intention of pursuing, I'm not sure I ever really wanted it the way some of my friends who are now successful in the field and hungry for a good lead, an anchor spot etc. WANT it. I'm decent at writing, love traveling and asking questions, but I don't wake up every morning itching to chase down a story. Switching to TV production was a wise move, but still no direction on that front either.

It could be that my generation is, by nature, just freaking confused about what to do with our lives. This seems to be a theme in NCCC anyway, many of my cohorts not knowing what the next step is. So to an extent, I can point to this generational indecision as a reason for my personal lack of life goals, but that's kind of a cop out. Keep in mind, I'm not apathetic or anything. I'd love to have some goals. ASAP in fact. My current job kicks ass: helping people across the country and having a totally amazing and unique life experience in the process. If anything, NCCC is as close to a dream job as I have ever gotten. But it only lasts 11 months. So then what?

Thanks for humoring me. I will try to make my next post about bunnies and double rainbows.